Purgatorio

An old poem, recently re-read, enjoyed, and thusly conveyed. After reading the Divine Comedy, a particular presence of opinion was struck upon; the inferno is our human folly; sundry, bestial, caprice. Purgatory is philosophy and the sophistry of mind, unable to escape the body. Upon release, we find our paradise.

Purgatory

I awoke one day to find

the sun shone in my room,

with such a dazzling radiance

to penetrate my gloom;

that I had come to feel so much

since the summer was eschewed

and with its passing so did end

the innocence of youth,

for I had grown to know a love

that sullied as it bloomed,

resplendent as it ought to’ve been

the truth had it coloured crude;

and with the cooling of our climes

my passions also cooled

as I swore I’d never feel again

and sent them to the tomb.

Yet here I were so suddenly,

roused by the warmth of sun,

and so little perturbed by misery

I went in search of love.

Initially I ambled

to the risen sun in sky,

and birds, they did sing loftily

as they swept and then flew high.

First I walked along a path

and then encroached

upon the heath,

I passed through bush and bramble

as my mind gave way to feet,

as I seemed to follow a dreary route

walked before but still unseen.

And turning, saw that I was lost,

no trodden sod before me,

only misty wilderness

‘cased by intrepid shrubbery.

The path I walked had gotten so dark

that now no light pervaded,

and walking it I did perceive

I was trapped by a green

that left me jaded.

So with nothing more ado

but what it is I’d done,

I set to a most determined pace

and simply carried on.

‘Wrap’t in solitary thought

I walked

through the very deluge

of night

with a keen insight

and a prosperous mind

poised

toward beauty

and truth’

It all seemed to me

no mystery,

no phantoms did I find-

but only thick and thicker trees

and others of their kind

all stood next to one another

so many in a row

and hedges rose from in-between,

all this I saw as I did go

trouncing out my legacy

I was a pioneer

and though the density had swallowed light

I was bolstered by my fear.

I gave a laugh to think just then

how superstitious I’d become,

to think the walls were moving in

or that I’d nearly thought to run,

and in their growing mockery,

or just to bring me down,

a branch I’d missed did cut me

deep across the crown;

the roots; they seemed more rigid

and the grass it did grow thick

and every once my clothes did catch

upon a grasping stick

as like limbs they did reach out,

and surely now were closer

so that I was again so full of dread

and the trees; they towered over.

Eventually I came to think

my way looked to be clearing,

exasperated, as I was

a weight was lifted as I were nearing

what I thought to presume to be

a lake that looked endearing.

Oh! Happy life

and grateful chance

to see such a lake appearing!

Addled and perspiring, I wept

then wiped my brow,

to see a break within their flanks

that I found, not knowing how.

Yet feeling it were a haven;

nestled away and safe,

there it was I fell to sleep

for what appeared to me like days.

First I dreamed of finer things

the fancies of infancy and grace,

never before had I known such peace

as when I laid down in that place;

in the arms of mine own enemy:

the persistent green that remained.

And as I lay, most surely,

my countenance did change-

for I felt as though I’d died

and died for such an age.

All such worries of my life

did rise and rise again,

and just as swift as they did come,

they’d sooner drift away,

leaving me to their successor

and my own indelible pain-

though every pain that came to me,

as numerous as rains,

did only last a moment

before their feeling was replaced.

I slept half an eternity,

and in that time did break

all of my thoughts and sufferings;

the little and the great.

And as each passed

I was reminded

how fickle they became,

still sleeping, so astoundingly,

as though the bed had been my grave.

Yet forever reassured I was,

though unable to awake,

that for every hurt

I thought to feel,

a greater one remained.

And in time they each became

 much smaller than my pleasure:

a pleasure sourced so strange;

a pleasure never known before,

as it were only carved from pain,

and so there sat upon my gait

an expression with no name.

There it was I grew so chilled

I screamed myself: “Awake!”

I gave a yawn and brushed myself

then finally did rise,

I looked about to get my bearings

the faceless mass did meet my eyes,

and I roved for a gap in the border;

the one through which I came

and finding it was nowhere

thought how I was trapped

as to be like game.

I travelled first with caution

along my perimeter to see,

and then again in reverse

but somewhat more quickly

this I did but ten times

thinking I had erred

but always left concluding

my way was deeply barred.

The path I took was overgrown

and now stood tall and wild

and just as dense as everywhere

they were as savage giants to a child.

Desperately, I pleaded:

“Will you not let me go!”

and there they swayed so silently

that I knew it for a ‘no’.

I walked myself to the edge of the lake

and crumbled to the floor

first I gazed out listlessly

and then with some furore

at how beautiful the water was

and in it, what I saw;

my wretched, limpid, exhausted face

scratched and beaten raw

and behind me, growing taller

stretched trees from sky to floor;

such was flipped my reflection

so that I knew it showed a truth;

that any way I looked at it

there was nary a way through.

And the water softly sparkled

with its placid siren’s call

blacker than any earthly thing

and I shone through its pall.

 Then everything was still

I clamoured for nought the more

but gave myself to purgatory

finally,

forever,

all.